Just when we had finished our last song on the Connect Festival in Scotland yesterday evening, and were about to walk back on stage for the encores, a woman (I won’t tell her name) slapped my ass.
She is not my girlfriend.
I just laughed. But then I wondered: Could I do the same thing to one of the brass girls? Or to Björk?
I seriously doubt it.
Women can do certain things to us that we can’t do to them.
But I guess we can do other things to them which they can’t do to us.
Fortunately I had some time with MEN ONLY back to Glasgow, namely Damian and Matt Robertson, who did all the brass arrangements for Björk. They were going to London, but gave me a lift to save me from the ass-slapping females. When we had about five minutes left before coming to the hotel, Damian - probably to bolster my hurt male ego - played a CD with the James Bond theme. Hearing the music associated with the biggest male chauvinist pig in the world of cinema made me feel OK again.
Seriously though, we now have a break for a few days, for our next concert will be on Saturday in Toronto.
I loved the concert yesterday. The crowd was fantastic! I think we did quite OK and I especially admired Chris Corsano for playing wonderfully, even though he had only slept for a couple of hours. He was supporting Sonic Youth in London the night before (I do envy him).
Below is a photo I took with my cell phone from the stage facing Inverary Castle:
Entries (RSS)
September 3rd, 2007 at 11:02 pm
I know several girls that would do the same if they had the chance
What a great location for a concert!
September 3rd, 2007 at 11:09 pm
There will be no ass-slapping females in Toronto, I assure you.
September 3rd, 2007 at 11:16 pm
I promise I won’t slap your ass in Toronto.
September 3rd, 2007 at 11:39 pm
I was there… I’m one of the pixels near the front of your photo. Loved it - you all played wonderfully and with so much energy. Thanks.
September 4th, 2007 at 2:21 am
So glad to read something about Chris Corsano, i was just telling a friend that i didn’t believe you’d written much about him. I really admire him as a musician, he’s impressive.
September 4th, 2007 at 9:52 am
well done, chris corsano!
i’m sure that whomever did the ass-slappin’ meant it affectionatley, but anything that makes a coworker uncomfortable is innappropriate, regardless of the intention.
September 4th, 2007 at 10:00 am
I just thought it was funny…
September 4th, 2007 at 4:39 pm
What a wonderful sight to look at while playing a concert. You have a nice crowd and an even nicer castle!
September 4th, 2007 at 6:53 pm
i have seen bjork before but this concert was absolutely brilliant, especially loved Declare Independence, particularly controversial at the moment with Scottish politics etc. what did you think of the drive to Inveraray? i was working next day so had to dash away early. bjork seemed to really put a lot of energy into her set, did she enjoy the location? did you go anywhere nice in Glasgow?
September 4th, 2007 at 7:44 pm
I think Matthew Barney wouldn’t appreciate you slap Bjork’s ass…
September 4th, 2007 at 11:59 pm
I think Bjork would slap you back.
September 5th, 2007 at 12:17 am
sorry i took it too seriously!
September 5th, 2007 at 12:04 pm
Björk should seriously get her ass slapped I think, no hesitation there!
September 5th, 2007 at 1:25 pm
A LIVE ALBUM!!! jippie! i hoped for that to happen!
September 5th, 2007 at 5:30 pm
Don’t complain Jonas. Every superstar has groupies.
September 5th, 2007 at 10:30 pm
Thanks for the photo Jónas! It looks like the castles an island in a human sea. :O Any way tour is bound to have its funny moments and I think for me as a guy its an awkward position to be put in, plus the fact that since your a dad you make that vow to drop all bs and drama. Give me and the fans props and Kudos to Chris, anyone who can crank it out with Sonic Youth one night then Björk the next must have some super hero blood in their veins. lol Any way as always best wishes on the tour and I hope your getting quality down time.
September 6th, 2007 at 8:35 am
hahahahaha rudidejong ! Sorry B. But man, what a fun and wonderful image. Now for the one upper… Jonas, I worked at Applebee’s as a bartender many years back, and my first week, a very attractive girl snuck up behind me, and swiped a credit car between my butt cheeks. I definitely asked my self the same question for about half a second, before decided, “no, no I could not do the same”. That being said I currently work with many girls who insist on thrusting their chests into me when we are working closely. I simply nudge them back with my elbow in an attempt to say I have a girlfriend please stop. They rarely stop. I don’t mind too much, because I am fond of breasts. The pitiful end
September 6th, 2007 at 8:36 am
that was “Credit Card”
September 6th, 2007 at 7:25 pm
“thrusting their chests into me when we are working closely…” I wouldn’t mind that too much!
September 6th, 2007 at 7:27 pm
Though the credit card trick sounds a bit too much…
September 6th, 2007 at 9:42 pm
If Björk let me slap her ass, I’d cry.
September 7th, 2007 at 1:00 am
It is kind of a double standard really……but depending on who is doing it…..I would not mind getting my ass slapped just a bit. And perhaps depending on the audience, I might do some chest thrusting as well. I think if the girl is a friend of yours, you can be safe to slap the ars occassionally, but if it is a business type relationship…..I probably would not try it. Do some slapping and let us know what happens lol.
Lava
September 7th, 2007 at 5:48 pm
you think only about ass
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